Chapter 1: The birth of the Edge
“...though there were casualties along the way (most notoriously dinosaurs), something better emerged out of the crisis.
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December 4th, 2014. This was the day I chose to live. I chose to continue experiencing this path I was on because this would uncover the greatest gift I would ever know, my true self.
Three years ago, I knew what it felt like to be completely numb — to feel absolutely nothing. But, it wasn't always numbness. Before that, there was quite a bit of anger, sadness, fear, and embarrassment mixed in. However, slowly over time, those emotions turned into silence.
I’m here to tell the story of being a twenty-two year old with a seemingly picture perfect life and how that all changed in an instant. I’m going to talk about about the departures of six-pack abs, one night stands, and that five year plan we all come out of college dreaming about. I went from logging hours at the gym to not having the energy to make it from the bed to the couch. I lost — or thought I lost — everything I knew and loved about my life.
It all started as one cyst and grew to many many that would eventually connect and overtake my face. I was fighting an unknown battle and it was visible for the entire world to see. From there it was the internal struggle, the revelation of highly toxic levels in my system, and the indescribable exhaustion. I’m here to talk about what that does to a person, how one twenty-two year old girl had her world completely turned upside down and was pushed to the edge of something she never thought she would survive.
It came down to one moment — making the conscious choice to live through this and find my purpose. I’m going to bring you to my darkest moments, because I want those people feeling around in the dark to understand that it is possible to find your way out. If there is anything I can say here that can help you get on the path to start evolving into the person you were meant to be — a person who is accepting of their own skin — then stick around for the story.